Never Buy A Stripper A Drink

3.21 - Nickless-sode or The Maniacal Music Label Machine

johnwayneisdead — Wed, 01 Sep 2010 10:55:02 +0000

Ever wonder what exactly it is that characterizes a type of music as a certain genre? Ever try to dismantle the intangible essence of something that is wholly and entirely subjective? Well, we did and we suggest that you probably don’t, but if you want to know what it would be like then we DO suggest that you listen to this episode. Nick’s away on a super secret mission but Robby C, JW, The ‘Sauce, & Apple step up to the challenge as they discuss what does, doesn’t, did, was and will give music a label. We feel some comments coming on so call the Chainsaw Memorial Pussy Grout Hot Line at (206)339-7771 to let us know where you weigh in!

During the song break (58:23), you heard “It’s Hydro, Oh” by Opposite Day available on their album, “What Is Is?”, available at their shows or by clicking on the cover below.

3.20 - Be Shat & Van Damned!

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Fri, 20 Aug 2010 09:03:10 +0000

Welp, those crazy kids of THE BE SHARPS & STAMOS finally made it back to Texas from the GULF-COAST CRAP TOUR. While disaster was their co-pilot, they made it home alive! This week we’ve got Jimmy, Kris, & Eddie of THE BE SHARPS! Also in the house, we’ve got their road handler, Atom “with a T”. Welcome the boys back with moving tales of action, adventure, & intrigue! Got your seatbelts on? Okey-dokey Dr. Jones! Hold on to your potatoes! Hear we go!

During this week’s song break (23:36) you heard “The Horror” By STAMOS

Leave us a voicemail at our Chainsaw Memorial Pussy Grout Hot-line! (206)339-7771.

3.19 - Weed Science

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Sat, 14 Aug 2010 07:30:30 +0000

Just like many of you, we’ve noticed the new wave of legal synthetic, smokable, herb showing up at more gatherings these days. Many of you are familiar with K2 & others. This week we decide to guinea pig ourselves out & try a blend called Mojeaux live on the show, in the name of science! Listen, in a chemically induced stupor, as we struggle to focus long enough to unravel the legal controversies behind the sale of these botanical & herbal “incense” packets. Apple & ‘Sauce volunteer this week as test subjects. Does this shit really work? Is it worth the cost, or are we better off spending our paper-stacks on the real deal? Join us & hear the remarkable results of our little experiment. Lord knows we can’t remember any of it!

48:51 - synthetic weed discussion

56:40 - experiment begins

During this week’s song break (47:12) you heard “She Likes Mayo More Than Mustard” By THE BE SHARPS available on their 7″ split vinyl release, “SHIT SANDWHICH”, available at their live shows & these fine Houston area record stores: VINAL EDGE, SOUND EXCHANGE, CACTUS MUSIC

Leave us a voicemail at our Chainsaw Memorial Pussy Grout Hot-line! (206)339-7771.

3.18 - SexASS Chainsaw Massacred?

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 12:57:58 +0000

This week is a somber week for us here at NEVER BUY A STRIPPER A DRINK. Our dear friend, CHAINSAW CHIC of the HOUSTON ROLLER DERBY’s BRAWLERS is reaching the end of one long, winding track & preparing to Emilio Estevez another. Can Marty Sauce’s blow-dance birthday surprises save the day? Find out on this week’s episode! We are also joined by the machismo-tastic, megalomaniac MR. CHAINSAW! Join us. Won’t you?

During this week’s song break (50:18) you heard “GERMAN LEATHER FUCKING” By CUPCAKE REACHAROUND from their May 2010 practice. Here’s a video of that moment in time:

Leave us a voicemail at our Chainsaw Memorial Pussy Grout Hot-line! (206)339-7771.

…Also! If you’re in the Houston area, be sure to catch OMEGA PROPHET’s own RAMEY O’BRIEN as he hits the stage on Monday, August 9th at Sherlock’s in River Oaks. Show starts at 9:30, 21 & up. No cover, cheap drinks!!! 1952 W. Gray St. Houston, TX 77019.

3.17 - The RENfest-isode

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 13:56:16 +0000

Well, it finally happened! The lovely “Red” Ren collected enough gold coins to gain back-door access to the NBSD Mansion. You’ve heard her voice on episodes 1.16 - Gotta’ Get Back in Time . . .”, 2.18 - “Do You Know What Today Is? It’s Our Anniversary”, & countless voicemails. Now, hear her angelic airings here on episode 3.17 - The RENfest-isode”! We are also joined Kris Jett of THE BE SHARPS as we pound back shots of a very peculiar Dominican potpourri-type rum & titillate each other with school girl gossip of the (then) state of Lindsey Lohan, repairing vaginal tears, & toilet sex! Check it out! It’s terRENfic!!!

During this week’s song break (54:23) you heard “Grande” from the 2005 LETTERS TO VOLTRON self-titled album, available at their live shows.

Share your comments for this episode here on our forum. Also, leave us a voicemail at our Chainsaw Memorial Pussy Grout Hot-line! (206)339-7771.

If you’re in the Houston area, be sure to come out to Big John’s Ice House on Saturday, July 24th, 2010 to see THE BE SHARPS live & to support the those oh-so-sexy MACHETE BETTIES of HOUSTON ROLLER DERBY. 2640 Briar Forest Dr. Houston, TX 77077

Will CHESTER Q. PENNYWORTH follow the same dark path that his uncle MARBLET did years ago? Find out here:

3.16 - AMERICA! FUCK ON!

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 08:17:07 +0000

Awwwshit y’all! It’s the 4th of July & the NBSD mansion is full of patriotic panache! This week we are joined once agian by Monseigneur Diaz & comedian RAMEY O’BRIEN as we analyze our country’s current state & ongoing progression. Are we all fucked or do we just pass that matzo ball onto our unaccounted for seedlings?! Find out, this week, on NEVER BUY A STRIPPER A DRINK!!!

Our AMERICA discussion begins at 50:45.

During this week’s song break (40:10) you heard a snippet of “D.P.” from the 2006 LETTERS TO VOLTRON album, G.R.O.W.L.; available at their live shows.

Share your comments for this episode here on our forum. Also, leave us a voicemail at our Chainsaw Memorial Pussy Grout Hot-line! (206)339-7771. If you’re in the Houston area, be sure to head out to SHERLOCK’S every Sunday & Monday night for mouth-breather suffocating stand-up comedy.

Treat yourself right without touching yourself for a change, & pick-up the all new 7″ split vinyl release, “SHIT SANDWHICH”, by LETTERS TO VOLTRON & THE BE SHARPS available at their live shows & these fine Houston area record stores: VINAL EDGE, SOUND EXCHANGE, CACTUS MUSIC

Get this sweet ‘SOUL GLO’ tee at 6Dollar Shirts for only $6! *Click on image below to visit 6Dollar Shirts.

3.11–3.15 - America’s Hot New Difficult Listening Sensation

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 14:33:15 +0000

This week we find ourselves remarkably comfortable and unprepared all at the same time as our discussion topics range from the relevantly topical to the left field, “WTF?” b.s. that this show seems to be rooted in. As we hit the reset button several times we finally settle in to an actual cognizant conversation about the ever growing oil spill right in our own backyard, and how it is and soon will be effecting us. Remember, speaker wire, pocket pussies and condoms all require petroleum in their production . . .

During this week’s break you heard a snippet from DANNY RIOS‘S set performed at SHERLOCK’S on June 6th. Hear it again and/or share your comments for this episode here on our forum. Also, leave us a voicemail at our Chainsaw Memorial Pussy Grout Hot-line! (206)339-7771. If you’re in the Houston area, be sure to head out to SHERLOCK’S every Sunday & Monday night for mouth-breather suffocating stand-up comedy, courtesy of the HOUSTON COMEDY UNION

3.10 - Public Shit-Chat

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Fri, 04 Jun 2010 23:34:29 +0000

HOLY SHIT! We are so full of shit, this week, our assholes are crowning with conversation! Pinch one off in public when listening to this one, ’cause that’s what we’re talkin’ ’bout, Willis! What’s on your checklist of precautions when it come to shitting in a public setting? Do you worry about upsetting the bliss of fellow humans that surround you? Could you give a shit? Hell, they knew what they were gettin’ into when they decided to enter the public shitter! Join us as we drop tha’ NBSD bomb on shitting in public! School, work, airports, coffee shops, dumpsters, & plastic shopping bags are some of our favorites! Leave us a voicemail on the Chainsaw Memorial Pussy-Grout Hotline with your public end-tales! (206)339-7771

This week’s song break track was BATH TIME from RobbyC’s Bakefest Featuring Pots and Pans Vol. 1-2.

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our forum or leave us a voicemail at our Chainsaw Memorial Pussy Grout Hot-line! (206)339-7771

GERMANLEATHERFUCKING! - Cupcake Reacharound video

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Wed, 26 May 2010 11:33:54 +0000

Check it out! Fresh outta’ the camp oven, comes MR. CHAINSAW & THE CUPCAKE REACHAROUND’s latest groove, GERMAN*LEATHER*FUCKING:

Click below to cum to the CUPCAKE layer:

If this video offends you, let the boys know via the CUPCAKE REACHAROUND forum thread or leave us a voicemail on our Chainsaw Memorial Pussy-Grout Hotline @ (206)339-7771

3.09 - Titty Tales, part 1: The Nipplesode

johnwayneisdead — Tue, 18 May 2010 23:46:38 +0000

This week we start the first in a multi-part series dealing with a subject very near and dear to our hearts; Titties! From the Guns of Naverone to the Itty Bitty Titty Committee we cover it all with admiration and no discrimination. Marty Sauce and returning guest Damien Marcos join us as we delve into our past to determine what shaped our love and respect for the might mammary!

This week’s song break track was ASSHOLE by THE BE SHARPS.

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our forum or leave us a voicemail at our Chainsaw Memorial Pussy Grout Hot-line! (206)339-7771

The Fleshlight - Sex Toy For Men
From: Vibrators.com

3.08 - Westbound While Brown? Not Me!

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Wed, 12 May 2010 06:30:11 +0000

WAR! ….Is what almost erupted in the NBSD mansion this week! Tempers were a-flarin’ as we attempted to break down our views of the recently passed, & controversial, Arizona immigration law. We are joined by Damian Marcos & comedian, Ramey O’Brien. Then, we dive out of their way as they start demanding to see each other’s IDs! Does a winner emerge from this shouting match? Do any of us get detained & then deported? Only one way to find out, sweet-cheeks! Don’t turn your nose up on this episode! Listen with the one you love & then debate who’s really “in control” when the bajowskis start happening!

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our forum or leave us a voicemail at our Chainsaw Memorial Pussy Grout Hot-line! (206)339-7771

Check out RAMEY O’BRIEN doing what he does:

3.07 - “Ya’ Can’t Sacrifice The Groove”

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Wed, 05 May 2010 21:48:27 +0000

This week, we’re once again joined by the fellas from TYRANT VIRUS. Gather around as we probe Reeves, Watner, & Caleb for their origins & influences. Also, hear Caleb share a cuming-of-age experience from his recently held high school prom. Find out if any of us get knocked up on this enchanted evening!

This week’s songbreak track is “Smith & Wesson Are Family Names” by TYRANT VIRUS

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our forum or leave us a voicemail at our Chainsaw Memorial Pussy Grout Hot-line! (206)339-7771

3.06 - Heavy Metal Make-Out!

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Mon, 19 Apr 2010 00:53:30 +0000

Our favorite guests (or at least most frequent), Boo of DOWNFALL 2012 & Fuckin’ Laur Laur, return to the NBSD couch to shoot tha’ shit, yet again! We are also joined by NBSD newbie, Ashley, who happens to bring some heavy metal magic into our otherwise Phil Collins lives. It’s sure to be a scream as we discuss, robot armies, artistic relevance, and a myriad societal failings!

Download HAREM FESTIVAL‘S new song, ‘Analogous Affinity’ now for FREE! Click image below for free download!

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our forum or leave us a voicemail at our Chainsaw Memorial Pussy Grout Hot-line! (206)339-7771

Harem Festival Studio Update 9

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Fri, 16 Apr 2010 08:17:01 +0000

Guitars get laid and the blue tape makes a return appearance for added protection!

Download HAREM FESTIVAL‘S new song, ‘Analogous Affinity’ now for FREE! Click image below for free download!

Talk shit about John Wayne, James, & Ryan in our HAREM FESTIVAL forum here or leave us a voicemail on our CHAINSAW MEMORIAL PUSSY-GROUT HOTLINE @ (206)339-7771

‘APOCAYPTO’ - DLG Ice video

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Sat, 10 Apr 2010 23:59:04 +0000

On a desolate day in March of 2010, REVEREND BUTTER trekked his way through the radioactive elements of post-apocalyptic-era Houston to demonstrate an art that may one day be the last salvation of Earth: ICE! Accept REVEREND BUTTER as your only hope for survival. Have him create something special for your party or event. You can scour the remains & ruins of H-town for him, but it’s much easier to call him at DLG ICE FACTORY @ (713)633-4603

The performance filmed here took place at the Houston SPACETAKER’S 6th Annual Gala: APOCALYPTO on March 20th, 2010. http://www.spacetaker.org Shot & chopped by Nick Poncio

3.05 - Did You Just Call These Chicks Broads?

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Sat, 10 Apr 2010 05:54:57 +0000

Ahhh! The benefits of telling people we have a podcast! (We have to tell ‘em. No one really listens to it. Right?) This week we conned three lovely ladies of the HOUSTON ROLLER DERBY to roll up & take the couch! Enjoy the inside scoop & sexy hip checks, as provided by “BEVERLY KILLS” of the BAYOU CITY BOSSE$, & “CHAINSAW CHIC” & “NIGHTMARE ON EM STREET” of THE BRAWLERS. Find out if we fly too close to the sun & get our asses turned inside-out. Also in tha’ crib is MR. CHAINSAW & Kris Jett of THE BE SHARPS! Don’t be a dick. Join us! Won’t you?

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our forum or leave us a voicemail on our Chainsaw Memorial Pussy Grout Hot-line! (206)339-7771

Get your HOUSTON ROLLER DERBY tickets HERE!

3.04 - Tattoos, Political Correctness, and You . . .

johnwayneisdead — Sun, 04 Apr 2010 11:38:10 +0000

This week award winning Houston Tattoo artist Sean “Ozz” Oliver sits in as our very special guest to tell us all about his tattooing experience and to do what he does best. That’s right, our very own pussy willow, John Wayne, gets all inked up during the recording of this episode. Also, the guys undergo ethnic re-assignment surgery (so to speak) when they get wind of how they’re sexy voices make them sound to other people.

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our forum or voicemail us @ (206)339-7771

Danny Rios @ FITZGERALD’S on St. Patrick’s Day

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Sat, 03 Apr 2010 10:45:56 +0000

A snippet from the St. Patrick’s Day show @ Fitzgerald’s.

3.03 - Unidentifiable Nuts: The Great Austin Road Trip

johnwayneisdead — Wed, 31 Mar 2010 02:40:47 +0000

Your old pals LETTERS TO VOLTRON and The THE BE SHARPS went to Austin during SXSW (“South by SouthWest” for you mouth-breathers) to play an off-festival show. It seemed like a good idea at the time, but quickly went south when happenstance and bitter cold decided to bite half of us in the ass. Did our heroes survive? Tune in to find out! L2V are joined by Mr. Chainsaw to tell the tale of GWAR and barbershop music on the long ride home.

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our forum or voicemail us @ (206)339-7771

‘WHO AM I?’ - DLG Ice Video

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Thu, 25 Mar 2010 03:34:52 +0000

On March 24th, 2010 REVEREND BUTTER was invited to be a guest on KHOU’s ‘GREAT DAY HOUSTON’ hosted by Deborah Duncan. The topic for the show was “What Makes You Famous?” Reverend Butter answered the riddle the only way he knows how; by slicin’, dicin’, & sacrificin’!! Have Reverend Butter create something special for your party or event. Call DLG ICE FACTORY @ (713)633-4603

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our REVEREND BUTTER forum or voicemail us @ (206)339-7771.

3.02 - Happy Rapeisode Day!

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Fri, 19 Mar 2010 11:31:03 +0000

ENTER: MARTY-SAUCE! We are proud to introduce to the world, LETTERS TO VOLTRON’s new skin-beater, Marty-sauce!! And now that you’re gaining consciousness after that wild St. Patrick’s Day chug-a-thon, gather around & listen up! This week we’re celebrating our culture’s obsession with celebrating holidays, especially if we have no idea why the day is celebrated in the first place! Also, REVEREND BUTTER returns to share freshly thawed tales of the 2010 Ice Art Championship in Alaska.

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our forum or voicemail us @ (206)339-7771

‘Building Blocks’ - DLG Ice Video

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Fri, 19 Mar 2010 10:19:09 +0000

Here’s a peek behind the scenes of the 2010 Ice Art Championship in Fairbanks, Alaska. Team: TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE brought home 6th place with their entry, ‘CHILD PROTECTION SERVICES’. Call DLG ICE FACTORY for a unique piece to accommodate your party or event. (713)633-4603. “Day One” is performed by DOWNFALL 2012’s.

TEAM TEXAS is:

BUDDY RASMUSSEN -Team Captain

Clay Rasmussen

REVEREND BUTTER

Dan “Hollywood” Rebholz

Get DOWNFALL 2012’s self-titled album here on iTunes:

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our REVEREND BUTTER forum or voicemail us @ (206)339-7771.

HAREM FESTIVAL Studio Sessions - part 6

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Fri, 12 Mar 2010 11:46:53 +0000

Them HAREM FESTIVAL boys mix it up with Karim and Chubbs in another session dedicated to drums. Ryan ‘one take jakes’ this one with a fresh, new molestache to boot!

Talk shit about John Wayne, James, & Ryan in our HAREM FESTIVAL forum here or leave us a voicemail @ (206)339-7771

3.01 - NUDE ERECTIONS

johnwayneisdead — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 07:25:13 +0000

We’re back once again after a break from our year anniversary show! With the party over and the walks of shame behind us, we’re ready to violate your ear canals with our wily, uncircumcised “love”.

This week we’re joined by comic extraordinaire, and host of the Houston Roller Derby, DANNY RIOS. He’s been on Last Comic Standing and was voted Funniest Man in Houston, so why he wants to come on our show is beyond us. Thanks to everyone for coming back to listen as we begin a season that we hope will suck slightly less than the last one. Find out when DANNY RIOS & other great Houston area comedians are on stage by visiting the HOUSTON COMEDY UNION page.

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our forum or voicemail us @ (206)339-7771

‘LETTERS TO VOLTRON’ Hit The Studio to Start New Album!

johnwayneisdead — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 07:23:13 +0000

Your old pals LETTERS TO VOLTRON, (and co-hosts of NBSD) are in the studio working on the new album! Also, we welcome Marty to the fold as well as his glorious sauce!

‘GONNA’ FLY NOW!’ - DLG Ice Video

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Sat, 06 Mar 2010 10:19:52 +0000

“Ya’ wanna’ see helicopters? I’ll show you helicopters!” Nothing is impossible to REVEREND BUTTER! Your ideas can become reality in ice! Hit him up at the DLG ICE FACTORY for a unique piece to accommodate your party or event. (713)633-4603.

2.18 - “Do You Know What Today Is? It’s Our Anniversary”

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Sat, 06 Feb 2010 12:19:02 +0000

… Well, not exactly? Ya’ see our first episode was posted way back on January 4th, 2009. As usual, we’re sixer short, & a month late! Oh well. Juneteenth, I guess? Anywhoo, …This episode is pure chaos. We can’t make heads or tails of it, so here ya’ go! Enter at your own risk. A handful of veteran guests return to fondle our berries as we probe each other until everyone is sore. Keep your hear-holes open for Boo of DOWNFALL 2012, the Chrises & a Keleb from TYRANT VIRUS, Kris, Jimmy, & Eddo of THE BE SHARPS, REVEREND BUTTER, “Curvy” Corvette & Nas-Tee Bone of THE HOUSTON PARTY BRIGADE, & many more! Join us, wont you? We understand if you won’t. Yeeeesh! It’s a real train-wreck!

…or download: (right click(Ctrl-click for Mac), “save link as”)

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our forum or voicemail us @ (206)339-7771

2.17 - Groin Pains or The Daddy Load?

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Fri, 15 Jan 2010 15:56:54 +0000

2010 IS THE YEAR TO WIN! …. or not? You decide. This week we’re joined again by Boo from DOWNFALL 2012 & Fuckin’ Laur Laur! To stay warm, we contemplate the lesser of two very evil & disturbing scenarios. Now with 74% more crotch mutilation! (Ugh! Makes me squirm recalling the the tension in the room! I can’t hold your hand any further. You’re on your own!) Cum right in & hear the freak-show!

…or download: (right click(Ctrl-click for Mac), “save link as”)

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our forum or voicemail us @ (206)339-7771

Here’s a peek behind the curtain:

2.16 - The Ice Man Cometh . . . Back!

johnwayneisdead — Thu, 31 Dec 2009 02:42:08 +0000

The illustrious REVEREND BUTTER returns to the NBSD couch this week to let us in on all of the madcap adventures that have ensued since his debut on TLC’s Chainsaw Ice Sculptors. The hits keep coming on the voice mail line, and Nick asks time and time again about what 2010 holds for all of us. We wrap up the new year in style as we turn in our final episode of 2009 with one of our favorite guests, so wrap up in a warm blanket and listen to this one with someone you love . . .

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our forum or voicemail us @ (206)339-7771

…or download: (right click(Ctrl-click for Mac), “save link as”)

2.15 - Suckin’ Satan’s Pecker: The Great ‘Sell Out’

johnwayneisdead — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 01:24:44 +0000

This week we join the race in the great internet money grab by adding affiliates to our site. Don’t worry though, these products we wholeheartedly endorse. You know your good old pals at Never Buy a Stripper a Drink wouldn’t steer you wrong . . . Anyway, join us as we discuss the art of “selling out”, & whether we have or have not sold out, ourselves. Have we been kicked off the artistic roster for good? Let us know what you think about all this hullabaloo by giving us a jingle at (206)339-7771.

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our forum or voicemail us @ (206)339-7771

…or download: (right click(Ctrl-click for Mac), “save link as”)

2.14 - Doorbustin’ Loose in the Name of the Lord

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Mon, 07 Dec 2009 20:31:58 +0000

Does Thanksgiving Day give you a raging hard-on? For, In just a few sweet hours, you’ll be stomping down some fragile, weaklings & be the first one in to clamp your grubby mitts onto a cheaply produced flat-screen t.v. at a rock bottom price! It’s okay that four people died in the stampede. After all, this consumer-gasmic event is all in the name of the lord, right? Hell, if Jesus was alive today, he’d karate-chop you in the throat to beat you to that $75 laptop.(which is running Widows Vista & possibly sporting a defunct HD-DVD burner. Shit, Wal-Mart’s got a mountain of these piled-up in a warehouse somewhere. Why not mark ‘em down & pass ‘em off off to some poor chump that thinks he’s getting over on the full-price-paying public!)

Tis the season to shop ’til you drop; come to, & shop some more! Join us this week as we attempt to analyze America’s unconscious obsession with “Black Friday” & “Doorbuster” retail sales. BOO & CASEY of DOWNFALL 2012 are in the house, (mostly because they thought we were having a sale) to share in on some yuletide terror! Special musical guest, the Avant Garde John Richard.

*By the way, does anyone find it strange that every greenback of our non-gold-backing currency has the statement “IN GOD WE TRUST” boldly printed on the back? A majority of us claim to worship an invisible man in the sky, but I do believe the almighty dollar is our one true god. As the celestial David Lee Roth once stated, “Everybody Wants Some! Baby, how ‘Bout You?”

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our forum or voicemail us @ (206)339-7771.

or download: (right click(Ctrl-click for Mac), “save link as”)

**RETAIL & SERVICE INDUSTRY WORKERS don’t forget to leave us a voicemail with your “shitty customer” stories.

HOLIDAY SHOPPERS don’t forget to leave us a voicemail with your “asshole store clerk” terror tales. (206)339-7771

2.12 - “TOILET-TV GENERATION” PARTY TONIGHT!

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 23:36:40 +0000

Was Al Bundy personally responsible for bringing on the trend of sitcoms with no redeeming moral value, or lesson to be learned? We think so, and whole-heartedly salute him for his hard work. This week we discuss sitcoms that don’t try to teach us anything about respect or values, and just be funny in all their selfish glory. Don’t forget to call us to chime in on this one!

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our forum or voicemail us @ (206)339-7771.

or download: (right click(Ctrl-click for Mac), “save link as”)

…. also, don’t forget to come out to the OMEGA PROPHET HOLIDAY BASH this Saturday, Dec. 5th at JET LOUNGE, (1515 Pease, downtown Houston, TX) starting @ 7 p.m.! Witness, in person, LETTERS TO VOLTRON, DOWNFALL 2012, HAREM FESTIVAL, THE HIDDEN IMAGES, TYRANT VIRUS, THE BE SHARPS, SUGARBALL EXPRESS, along with ice sculptured shot-blocks by REVEREND BUTTER of the DLG ICE FACTORY & a V.I.P. lounge hosted by the sexy ladies of HOUSTON PARTY BRIGADE! Be there, or fuck off!!!

2.13 - DONKEY KICKS & TRIPLE-SPLITS: P.B. INVASION II

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 23:16:49 +0000

Sooooo, the sweet-assed ladies of PARTY BRIGADE stumble home, drunk on a late Tuesday night & demand the mics, the NBSD mansion, & the show! Join the curvy “Corpus”, the titillating “T-Bone”, & a pants-less “Corvette” as they “sexy” up this joint for a change! Curl up with your favorite cocktail & get ready to “choose your own adventure” with PARTY BRIGADE! The ladies rule this week, so check it out and let us know if they get our jobs!

*NBSD is not responsible for blown minds, busted eardrums, or any other bodily functions that result from this episode.

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our forum or voicemail us @ (206)339-7771.

or download: (right click(Ctrl-click for Mac), “save link as”)

…Also, don’t forget to come out to the OMEGA PROPHET HOLIDAY BASH this Saturday, Dec. 5th at JET LOUNGE, (1515 Pease, downtown Houston, TX) starting @ 7 p.m.! Witness, in person, LETTERS TO VOLTRON, DOWNFALL 2012, HAREM FESTIVAL, THE HIDDEN IMAGES, TYRANT VIRUS, THE BE SHARPS, SUGARBALL EXPRESS, along with ice sculptured shot-blocks by REVEREND BUTTER of the DLG ICE FACTORY & a V.I.P. lounge hosted by the sexy ladies of HOUSTON PARTY BRIGADE! Be there, or fuck off!!!

2.11 - Hipster Squared

johnwayneisdead — Sat, 14 Nov 2009 00:52:03 +0000

This week we return in all our glorious splendor to discuss hipsters, scenesters, scene kids, or whatever the hell it is you want to call them. Boo from Downfall 2012 and Fucking Lor Lor are with us to lend their perspective on the whole idea. Also, we have some very interesting voicemails to listen to including a very special shout out from across the pond. Keep those calls cumming!

Discuss or share your comments for this topic here on our forum or voicemail us @ (206)339-7771.

or download: (right click(Ctrl-click for Mac), “save link as”)

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2.10 - I’m Gonna’ Make You Feel Beautiful!

johnwayneisdead — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 05:31:49 +0000

This week we have the guys from TYRANT VIRUS stop by to answer a typical question you would come to expect from your pals here at Never Buy a Stripper a Drink. You’ll have to listen to find out what it is though. Also, we discuss the generation gap in cartoons these days and decide exactly which one of us was raised on pussy-willow shit! PARTY BRIGADE checks in on voice mail, as well as a couple of other excitable friends, and we get some words of encouragement from Laur-Laur. Yup, just another jam packed fun week for us.

Discuss or share your comments for CARTOONS OF CHILDHOOD PAST here on our forum or voicemail us @ (206)339-7771.

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2.09 - Marge Simpson Frees ‘The Springfield Two!’

johnwayneisdead — Sun, 18 Oct 2009 14:09:20 +0000

That’s right everyone, Marge Simpson bears it all in Playboy this month and you can bet your good friends at Never Buy a Stripper a Drink were lined up at midnight to get their copies. Were joined by The Be Sharps and Monsignor Dees as we discuss the overall impact and significance this event and The Simpsons themselves have had on our lives.

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2.08 - Anals and Eye-Holes . . .

johnwayneisdead — Thu, 08 Oct 2009 23:29:30 +0000

Alright, it’s real simple! This week we talk about showers . . . wet, dirty, very wet showers with our special guests Markeshia and Laurie. Also, we explore the literal meaning of our namesake as local strip club D.B. Cooper’s Mansion is shut down. Call me! New voicemail number available. (206)339-7771

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2.07 - IT’S A MADHOUSE!!!

johnwayneisdead — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 12:58:34 +0000

Ladies and gentlemen may we officially present to you: THE PARTY BRIGADE. This “madhouse” of an episode features The Reverend Butter, Brad, Darrel, and a few of the fine ladies that make up the organization mentioned above. Talk of ice, cocks, and mad cap craziness ensue in this completely hijacked episode rounded out by a new “Name that Nick” and a cover of Letters to Voltron’s ‘Back Door Beauty’ by The Be Sharps.

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2.06 - We Had Alot of Nothing to Say…We’re Gonna’ Piss ‘em!

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Sat, 19 Sep 2009 14:19:02 +0000

This week we’re simply ramblin’ on with pointless tales of days past. Sorry, nothing to see here. Move along …move along! “Name that Nick” starts this week. First person to identify the name of the movie featuring the “Nick” in the show greeting wins an extra special prize! Go to our forum to reveal your guess. Also, be sure to send in your comments or malfeasance call outs to neverbuyastripperadrink@gmail.com. We will read your words live (as we record) on the show!! Be honest! Be critical!! Be heard!!!

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2.05 - Retirement Home for Porn Stars

johnwayneisdead — Thu, 10 Sep 2009 23:28:32 +0000

Ever wonder what happens when your favorite porn stars retire? We do, so this week our good friend The Mayor of Pussycum joins us once again to help shed some light and share some wisdom. Are they put out to stud, so to speak? Do they move off to Florida and wear white pants and patent leather shoes until they die, or are they ground up into dust and used to make the porn stars of the future? Find out in this tantalizing episode, and also hear an ad from our latest sponsor!

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2.04 - “The Be Sharps” Give The Shocker

johnwayneisdead — Thu, 20 Aug 2009 06:22:15 +0000

This week we discuss everything and anything shocking and it’s startling availability. Don’t cry for us though, we’re already dead. Also, new members of the Omega Prophet fold, The Be Sharps stop in to play some tunes, and add to the conversation. How many times will we talk about The Ramones? Tune in this week and find out.

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2.03 - VAN DAMMIT! REAL LIFE-SIZED ACTION FIGURES

johnwayneisdead — Fri, 14 Aug 2009 01:03:04 +0000

This week we’re discussing action heroes, past & present with a particular emphasis on who made and defined the genre. Stallone, Arnie, Van Damme and that’s just a few of the top big guys. Why are the action stars of today such big fucking pussy willows? Find out the answer to this and other riveting questions about muscles. porn, and Phil Collins encapsulated in this episode.

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2.02 - Downfall 2012 and the Traveling Masturbators

johnwayneisdead — Fri, 31 Jul 2009 00:41:51 +0000

Welcome back kiddos! Delving further into our second season we are pleased as punch to have fellow Omega Prophet brothers and good friends Downfall 2012 in the studio to tell us all about their recent “To The Top” tour across this great nation in which we live. This episode is packed with great stories from the road and little nuggets of truth that help get you through. Other guests this week include Mix who will be working with L2V very soon, and maybe even a pop in from Mr. Gary Busey. Check it out!

2.01 - Electric Boogaloo the Season or Fuck On!

johnwayneisdead — Sat, 11 Jul 2009 05:36:37 +0000

Alright, alright we came back so all you celebrities can stop dropping dead. We’re here with a fresh batch of goodies and a bag full of cream corn. Can you explain to all your friends what this show is all about? We sure can’t. Also, I see a strange and interesting phone call in your future so be sure to pick up this time. And finally, we discover the two categories that everything can be broken down into: Good and Shit. Anyway, thanks for coming back home to us; you won’t be disappointed!

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1.20 - The XX, Here’s Tax in Your Eye, and See ya’ Next Season

johnwayneisdead — Thu, 18 Jun 2009 20:58:46 +0000

As we wrap up our inaugural season with our big 20th episode we find a lot of things have come full circle like red light cameras, odd bathroom lore, and the return of Monseigneur Diaz. We go out on a bang as we attempt to dissect the reasoning behind a soon to come sugar and beer tax! Are we not free to sin as we please anymore is this great country? When they start taxing masturbation I’m moving to Canada. Thanks to all who’ve been with us thus far, and tune back in for all the wackiness of Season 2 coming very soon!

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1.19 - BAM! Here’s a dick!!!

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 22:00:49 +0000

Have you noticed lately how bare naked cock has become more and more prevalent in films these days? It has always been around, that’s true, but its never been more in your face then it has been as of late. Has dick become the new boobs in movies (god, I hope not), or is this just a shock tactic used by directors to get a cheap laugh out of all us ’seen it all’ movie goers? Rest assured the three of us are at no loss for fodder when it comes to this topic.

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1.18 - KGB, The New Trend for American Mouth Breathers.

johnwayneisdead — Thu, 28 May 2009 03:33:21 +0000

This week we tackle the subject of texting services and just how relevant they really are. Sounds like a scam or possibly scamola to us, but we’ll leave that to the mouth breathers to decide. Your good old buddies in Letters to Voltron reveal some new tunage that’s sure to goo-ify your gray matter and excite all your special parts at the same time. Stop in to the forum to keep this conversation going, or talk about whatever the fuck you want!

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1.17 - “Somebody bet their life on this pussy . . . and then they cloned it”

johnwayneisdead — Wed, 20 May 2009 03:28:23 +0000

How much does dear old Fido mean to you, really? After they’ve passed on to doggy heaven or descended to the depths of doggy hell would you be willing to pay $150,000 to have a clone of them? Would it be the same, or would something go horribly wrong? What exactly is a cum loader, and is that on your vanity license plate? The answer to all of these questions lies in this episode! Listen if you have the stones!

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1.16 - Gotta’ Get Back in Time . . .

RobbyC — Wed, 13 May 2009 19:43:30 +0000

We take the show on the road again this week Willie Nelson style and end up at our good friend Kris’s crawfish boil and beer drinking extravaganza. We want to know if you were all of a sudden transported back to 1955 what you miss the most about 21st century living? Would it be advanced medical technology, highly accelerated and high end technology, or just plain old internet porn? We’ve got some rather interesting responses from all our friends who chimed in on this one. Thanks everyone!

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1.15 - The Shitty Bootleg

admin — Sun, 03 May 2009 21:32:28 +0000

This week we take it to the streets and out of the studio bringing you the entire episode from the latest Letters to Voltron show with our good friends, Sugarball Express. Throughout the evening we experience some less than desirable conditions and treatment and decided to share the entire experience with you, our beloved listeners. Remember, there is a fast forward button if things get to “real” for you, and by that we mean “real shitty”. Be sure to at least listen to our words of positivity and well wishing at the end though. It’s worth it!

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1.14 - Pucker Up!

johnwayneisdead — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 19:05:44 +0000

This week, well, this week we delve into the pains of one of our brothers. Robby C “sheds some light” on a small problem that has him all fit to tied. Prepare for some heavy duty learning on this episode as we break down the true ass pains of life.

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1.13 - The Emperor’s No Clothes

johnwayneisdead — Mon, 13 Apr 2009 04:02:10 +0000

Ever wonder where you can get the biggest life size adult novelty, the best gag porn, or even where you can just kick back, relax and enjoy a good episode of Mr. Wizard? Well, our special guest this week, the Mayor of Pussycum is here to answer these and many other questions we have for him. We’re going double deep, at time of purchase only, this week! Oh yeah, and we love Tom Atkins!

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1.12 - The Icy Deep Throat

johnwayneisdead — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 00:36:10 +0000

This week we have a very special guest join us all the way from the secret arctic zone of the DLG Ice Factory. That’s right, Reverend Butter is here to share with us his passion, his wisdom, and his special brand of cold filtered sexual healing. We talk about everything from cock blocks, to dick-cycle’s, to the joys of sculpting to Biohazard. Be sure to get in on the exclusive contest offered by the Rev during this episode, as I am sure it will be worth everyone’s while. Dan from Downfall 2012 joins us to talk about the Cold Front and horseback riding, and Markeshia breaks down what happens when passion parties get awesomer then normal. You can not miss this one!

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1.11 - The Great Tit Debate!

RobbyC — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 15:45:51 +0000

This week we tackle the hard hitting, controversial yet somewhat arousing subject of breast feeding in public. We weigh the pros, cons, and necessities of the whole darn thing, and even have singer/songwriter and recent mother Alexis Nicole in the studio to give us the down low on the real. Alexis also gives us one huge finger in the asshole in the form of song with our first ever live, in house performance that we know you’ll love. Her love partner and our good friend Hip- Bone aka Ryan from Harem Festival joins in on all the fun as well.

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1.10 - Its Called a Fetish . . .

johnwayneisdead — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 21:59:34 +0000

In our momentous 10th episode we take on some hard core topics including fetishes, electricity, and the long awaited female version of the drive time erection. Can we push the envelope any further as a society of sexual deviants? Will we be forced into a cultural regression brought on by pee-hole stabbing and over worked technology? Find out as our guests: Dan of Downfall 2012 and the lovely and talented Markeshia weigh in on these and other titillating topics!

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1.09.5 - Behind the Scenes Exclusive or What Happened . . . ?

johnwayneisdead — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 01:42:31 +0000

This week we bring you a mini episode in which we captured all the behind the scenes action that went down at the First Ever Semi Annual, St. Patrick’s Day, Near Death, Chug-A-Lug brought to you by Downfall 2012 and Omega Prophet Promotions. This documents all the gooey extras you didn’t get to see in the video including interviews with the winners and not so winners of the contest. Be sure to check out the video on the Downfall 2012 Youtube page, and pass it on to all your friends and enemies alike. We’ll be back in full effect next week with a new power packed episode, so until then . . .

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1.09 - Come Get Some! The Bruce Campbell Episode

johnwayneisdead — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 17:52:02 +0000

This week we dedicate the episode to one of our all time heroes, Bruce Campbell, with an idea about as focused as his career. Next thing you know we’re buying kids beer, meeting at the skating rink, and discussing the fuckability of fish. Brad is hanging out again to release his nuggets of wisodm once they are pulled by many fingers from his asshole. Gimmee’ some sugar baby!

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1.08 - Origin: The Birth of Awesome . . .

johnwayneisdead — Wed, 25 Feb 2009 17:02:44 +0000

This week we delve into to the warm doughy center of where we came from while sprinkling some old school gems along the way. Be mindful of the clown suit on this one as dreams get dreamy, massage parlors get creamy, and hey, it looks like we’re all dicks! Guests include Aldo, Apple, and Brad with some special info. on our new and improved forum. Come be wet noodles one and all!

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1.07 - Nipple Dick Skin, and Other Uses . . .

johnwayneisdead — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 01:28:00 +0000

To borrow the term from Aquateen Hunger Force, this episode could be more aptly titled Dickisode. This week we seem to discuss the topic at length, only to end up talking about it again, and again, and again. However, the real question is are you up to the Nipple Dick Skin challenge? Visit our forum at http://www.neverbuyastripperadrink.com/forum to let us know what your thoughts on that are. We also have our special guest this week, Dan from DOWNFALL 2012, to help us make sense of all this dicky madness . . .

…or download: (right click(Ctrl-click for Mac), “save link as”)

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1.06 - Hello Baby! Bopperquest 2009 . . .

Nick (Omega Prophet Exposure Overlord) — Thu, 12 Feb 2009 16:48:10 +0000

We talked about and then we went and did it. That’s right folks, your good pals at Never Buy a Stripper a Drink took a field trip out to the one and only Big Bopper’s grave sight on the 50th anniversary of The Day the Music Died. This episode has thrills, chills, spills, Christian Bale and frivolous masturbation. Ahhh baby, that’s a what I like!

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Never Buy A Stripper A Drink

3.21 - Nickless-sode or The Maniacal Music Label Machine

3.20 - Be Shat & Van Damned!

3.19 - Weed Science

3.18 - SexASS Chainsaw Massacred?

3.17 - The RENfest-isode

3.16 - AMERICA! FUCK ON!

3.11–3.15 - America’s Hot New Difficult Listening Sensation

3.10 - Public Shit-Chat

GERMAN*LEATHER*FUCKING! - Cupcake Reacharound video

3.09 - Titty Tales, part 1: The Nipplesode

3.08 - Westbound While Brown? Not Me!

3.07 - “Ya’ Can’t Sacrifice The Groove”

3.06 - Heavy Metal Make-Out!

Harem Festival Studio Update 9

‘APOCAYPTO’ - DLG Ice video

3.05 - Did You Just Call These Chicks Broads?

3.04 - Tattoos, Political Correctness, and You . . .

Danny Rios @ FITZGERALD’S on St. Patrick’s Day

3.03 - Unidentifiable Nuts: The Great Austin Road Trip

‘WHO AM I?’ - DLG Ice Video

3.02 - Happy Rapeisode Day!

‘Building Blocks’ - DLG Ice Video

HAREM FESTIVAL Studio Sessions - part 6

3.01 - NUDE ERECTIONS

‘LETTERS TO VOLTRON’ Hit The Studio to Start New Album!

‘GONNA’ FLY NOW!’ - DLG Ice Video

2.18 - “Do You Know What Today Is? It’s Our Anniversary”

2.17 - Groin Pains or The Daddy Load?

2.16 - The Ice Man Cometh . . . Back!

2.15 - Suckin’ Satan’s Pecker: The Great ‘Sell Out’

2.14 - Doorbustin’ Loose in the Name of the Lord

2.12 - “TOILET-TV GENERATION” PARTY TONIGHT!

2.13 - DONKEY KICKS & TRIPLE-SPLITS: P.B. INVASION II

2.11 - Hipster Squared

2.10 - I’m Gonna’ Make You Feel Beautiful!

2.09 - Marge Simpson Frees ‘The Springfield Two!’

2.08 - Anals and Eye-Holes . . .

2.07 - IT’S A MADHOUSE!!!

2.06 - We Had Alot of Nothing to Say…We’re Gonna’ Piss ‘em!

2.05 - Retirement Home for Porn Stars

2.04 - “The Be Sharps” Give The Shocker

2.03 - VAN DAMMIT! REAL LIFE-SIZED ACTION FIGURES

2.02 - Downfall 2012 and the Traveling Masturbators

2.01 - Electric Boogaloo the Season or Fuck On!

1.20 - The XX, Here’s Tax in Your Eye, and See ya’ Next Season

1.19 - BAM! Here’s a dick!!!

1.18 - KGB, The New Trend for American Mouth Breathers.

1.17 - “Somebody bet their life on this pussy . . . and then they cloned it”

1.16 - Gotta’ Get Back in Time . . .

1.15 - The Shitty Bootleg

1.14 - Pucker Up!

1.13 - The Emperor’s No Clothes

1.12 - The Icy Deep Throat

1.11 - The Great Tit Debate!

1.10 - Its Called a Fetish . . .

1.09.5 - Behind the Scenes Exclusive or What Happened . . . ?

1.09 - Come Get Some! The Bruce Campbell Episode

1.08 - Origin: The Birth of Awesome . . .

1.07 - Nipple Dick Skin, and Other Uses . . .

1.06 - Hello Baby! Bopperquest 2009 . . .

GERMANLEATHERFUCKING! - Cupcake Reacharound video